How to advocate for yourself in medical appointments

Advocating for yourself doesn’t mean being pushy. It means taking an active role in decisions about your health, so your doctor understands both your priorities and your symptoms.

1. Know what you want from the appointment

A few minutes of thought before you enter can change the entire tone of the consultation.
Are you hoping for a diagnosis? Reassurance? Clarity on a test or referral? Knowing this helps you focus your questions and stops the conversation from drifting.

Writing down your main aim, even in a single line, helps you stay on track when time is short.

2. Remember: your perspective matters

Doctors bring clinical knowledge. You bring context on how your condition affects your daily life, work, sleep, or mental health. Both perspectives are essential. It’s easy to downplay your experience or assume the doctor has all the answers, but they can’t treat what they don’t know.

Describe what’s most important to you, not just what feels most “medical.” That might mean saying, “My main goal is to get my energy back so I can work full days again,” or “I’m worried about how this medication affects my sleep.”

Those details help your doctor shape a plan that works in real life, not just on paper.

3. Ask for clarity, and keep asking until it’s clear

If you don’t understand something, say so. Doctors are used to explaining complex issues, and it’s their job to make sure you understand what’s being recommended. You might say:

• “Can you explain that in simpler terms?”
• “What does that test actually check for?”
• “Can you tell me what the next step will be?”

Research shows that when patients ask questions and confirm their understanding, they remember information more accurately and are more likely to follow treatment plans¹.

4. Bring notes or support if you need it

If you find it difficult to process information quickly, consider taking notes or bringing someone you trust. It’s completely normal to feel overwhelmed or forget details, especially when the conversation involves new terms or worrying news.

A friend, family member or app like Mirror can help you record and review what was said later, so you can make decisions with a clear head.

5. Be polite but assertive

Advocating for yourself doesn’t mean being confrontational. If you feel your concerns are being overlooked, try phrases like:

• “I understand time’s limited, but this is really affecting me.”
• “I’d like to make sure we talk about X before we finish.”
• “Can we discuss other options if this treatment doesn’t work for me?”

Politeness and clarity go further than frustration. You’re not challenging your doctor, you’re collaborating.

6. Follow up when needed

If you leave feeling unclear, you can always follow up. Most GP practices now have online messaging systems or care coordinators who can pass questions on.

Asking for clarification isn’t a nuisance; it’s part of good care. Doctors prefer patients who stay engaged and informed.

In summary

Advocating for yourself means recognising that you’re an equal partner in your healthcare.
You don’t need to be an expert,  just clear about your priorities, honest about your experience, and willing to ask when something doesn’t make sense.

Good care starts with good communication, and you’re allowed to take up space in that conversation.